It was only a matter of time, wasn’t it? After tearing through beloved children’s classics, rewriting history through the lens of grievance, and regulating your gas stove into extinction, the left has found a new target for its unrelenting march toward joyless utopia: your dog.
That’s right. The latest pearl-clutching panic from the green commissars comes via a recently published Australian review in Pacific Conservation Biology, claiming that dogs—yes, domestic, tail-wagging, ball-fetching dogs—are an overlooked menace to the environment. The authors warn that man’s best friend has “extensive and multifarious” environmental impacts, from disturbing shorebirds to peeing in creeks to committing the unpardonable sin of existing while emitting carbon dioxide.
And, of course, this anti-canine crusade is being trotted out under the usual banner: climate change.
Let’s be blunt. What this really is, is the logical end of an ideology that no longer seeks to preserve the environment but to control people—and strip away anything that brings them happiness. And if you think it stops at gas stoves, meat, or air conditioning, think again. The green agenda is all-consuming, and joy is the carbon footprint it wants to erase.
Dogs have “extensive and multifarious” environmental impacts, disturbing wildlife, polluting waterways and contributing to carbon emissions, new research has found. https://t.co/J2JXsybuSN
— Mother Jones (@MotherJones) April 15, 2025
They’ve banned plastic straws. They’ve villainized SUVs. Now? They’re asking you to second-guess your Labrador. It’s madness, yes—but it’s also exactly what happens when ideology becomes religion and data becomes a cudgel.
The study takes aim at dogs for disturbing wildlife, polluting streams, and, naturally, contributing to carbon emissions. Dogs eat meat, they breathe, they poop—all apparently problematic to the academic eco-zealots now demanding a leash on every facet of your life. One wonders how long it will be before some bright spark proposes a dog “carbon tax” or recommends drone surveillance of your poodle’s potty schedule.
https://t.co/DMo6bMS92v pic.twitter.com/54DFlsMQlY
— Bonchie (@bonchieredstate) April 15, 2025
And let’s not miss the absurdity here. Are we to believe that the family golden retriever is now a bigger climate threat than the unchecked industrial output of China? Or that chasing a goose at the lake is equivalent to an oil spill? Where does it end? Should we round up foxes next? Outlaw beavers? Fine kangaroos for bouncing too much?
This isn’t about science—it’s about control. And it’s a perfect illustration of where the radical environmental movement has gone off the rails. There is no finish line in this ideological race. Every solution gives way to a new crisis. Every bit of normalcy becomes a threat.
It’s not enough for these people to live their lives differently—they must force you to live differently, too. Even if it means turning the nation’s pets into political scapegoats. Even if it means going after dogs.
